Made not born...

Talking with my friend last night got me to thinking. I've already posted about not thinking too much, which in itself is a paradox, because by looking for a solution for that particular problem, I have to think about it. In a word, damn. But, as usual, I digress. I was telling my friend how I need to look for a balance between going practical and going cold. How much do I have to drop the hero and romantic in me, both integral parts that I like a lot about myself. And I remember thinking to myself "I can always go all-tactical, I can do strategy in my sleep, I'm a warrior born." But you know what, that's not true ! That's not true at all.
I'm a warrior, true. I can out-strategize the best of them and my friends who've seen me switch to tactical mode know that I'm good at it. But I wasn't born that way, far from it. If anything, I was born a geek. It wasn't until my teen years that I actually started making that change, first as a hobby, reading strategy books and working out, and then being formally trained in martial arts and combative tactics. But it is the fruit of a decision to change or complement my way of life. Not to get into or out of fights, when I say I'm a warrior I mean much more than that. Modern strategy courses and experts, in business or any other sense, refer to Sun-Tzu's work and an indespensable read. And it is a book about, literally, war.
When faced with a choice, my tactical mind immediately starts tracing paths and solutions, good points and bad. The problem is, most of the time I start weighing in not just my odds, but how my choices affect other people. And that's when I start to let emotions get in the way. That's when I start putting other people (not anybody, mind you, important people) over me in my priority list. Of course, that's when I start overworking the hamster, and I get into trouble. What I've now realized is that if I trained myself to start thinking that way, logic states that I can do the same again. Just train myself to make my choices in a different way, get used to it. Teach my mind which factors need to be weighed in and to what extent. When should I care about myself, and when should I worry about others. And it can be done. Actually, it's the way to go. If your strategy isn't working, adapt and overcome. Learn your weaknesses, learn from them, and fortify them one by one.
It's going to be quite a year, and I say it again: there are changes in the wind... lets see where they might take us.